So, I went to the cafeteria for lunch today, which is something I never do, but the lunch I was supposed to have yesterday got postponed to today, so whatever. Cafeteria it is. So, of course, I have to scope out the healthiest food option. Salad bar? Too tempting. Pasta bar? Not if I want to stay full for more than two hours. Dessert cart? Who are you kidding?
Finally, I spot the "Healthy Living" option. Alright. Chicken stir fry. I can do that. It comes with two vegetables. Okay so far. The vegetables are rice and a cauliflower/carrot mixture. This is where it gets tricky. I don't want the rice. And I don't like cooked carrots. So, I look around - hey, right over there! Two trays down from the mixed cauliflower/carrots - there's a tray of just cauliflower! Perfect!
Me: "Can I have the chicken stir fry with a double portion of cauliflower?"
Lunchlady: "Chicken satay?"
Me: "Stir fry, please?"
Lunchlady: "No cauliflower with stir fry." *points to cauli/carrot mixture* "This with stir fry."
Me: "No? I can't just... there's plain cauliflower right there..." *plaintive smile*
Lunchlady: "No. This cauliflower comes with the stir fry. That cauliflower comes with the chicken satay."
Me: "Really? Just...?"
Me: "Forget it." *sighs and walks over to the sandwich line*
I ended up with a greasy grilled chicken breast, on which I had to use four napkins on to soak up the grease, and a cup of red grapes. And then the co-worker I was having lunch with said, "That's not enough food."
Seriously, lunch should not be this fraught with peril.